Imagine your Perfect Day
Imagine your Perfect Day…what would you do? Where would you be? Who would you be with?
One of the questions that often comes up when I guide people through the Ideal Day exercise is, is OK to try to make an ideal day come true? Is this not selfish?
I always say that it is important to be selfish when it comes to your soul needs. Now the word selfish has negative meaning in our culture, but in this context it means self-care: caring for your self.
Imagine your Perfect Day exercise is designed to help you get in touch with what is most important to you in life. For example if part of your ideal day is to have quiet time to yourself in the morning — to write in your journal or meditate — but in reality your life mornings are nearly always chaotic: getting ready for work, perhaps getting the children out of the door in time for school, what message do you send to yourself? What does it do to your energy in the short and long term?
Do you think there might be resentment there, some unfulfilled longing? Or feeling that you are not taking care of yourself, perhaps that other people’s needs have more priority than your own?
What if you made that quiet time to yourself a priority? Would it be selfish? If you, as an example, negotiated with your family to help out in the morning, as a family you prepared some things the night before, and you got up a half an hour earlier for that precious quiet time, would you be a happier person? And would you being happy have an effect on your family?
Yes! Yes! This is why being selfish (taking care of your own needs) is a gift to others. When your content, others in your life are as well.
Are there limits? Say for example what you desire is something that would put you at risk of injury. If your ideal day, or some part of it, is not in alignment with commitments you have made to loved ones, it requires much more discussion and negotiation with your family.
And what if your ideal day isn’t practical? For example many people’s vision of an ideal day is a vacation. They imagine themselves at the ocean (and they live in the mid-west).
It isn’t always about the activity itself (this is especially good to know for those impractical and/or risky dreams.) Sometimes it is about the feeling you desire: excitement, peace, calmness, connection, experiencing love and joy. What is the feeling that you want to generate and how can you bring more of that feeling in your life?
(c) Deborah Redfern, 2008. All rights reserved.
